Can You Marry Your Ideal Type?

Who is the right person for you? For many people, the hard part is that they don't even know what kind of person they want.

Type "find my ideal type" into a search bar and what comes up is ideal-type bracket games, ideal types by MBTI, novelty psychology quizzes and fortune-telling. It's a sad reality that people leave the question of their lifelong partner to things like these.

Finding your ideal type can be a real challenge for many people. Everyone wants to fall in love, but finding the person who is truly right for you is no easy task. To find your ideal type, you need a deep understanding of yourself and clear criteria. In this column, we'll look at how to meet the person who's right for you.

1. Understand yourself first

The very first thing you need to do to find your ideal type is to understand yourself. Only when you clearly know who you are and what you want can you define your ideal type in concrete terms. Here are some questions that will help you understand yourself:

• What external, internal and financial assets do I have?
• What are the strengths and weaknesses of my personality?
• What values and goals do I hold?
• What kind of lifestyle do I prefer?

Understanding yourself is the essential foundation for defining your ideal type. When you know clearly who you are, it becomes much easier to judge who you'd be a good match with.

2. Make your ideal type concrete

Defining your ideal type in vague terms doesn't help. You need specific criteria so that you can recognize that person when you actually meet them. To make your ideal type concrete, consider the following factors

• What external, internal and financial assets do I want my partner to have?
• Personality: which personality traits matter most to me?
• Values: what values do I consider most important in life?
• Hobbies and interests: what hobbies or interests could we enjoy together?
• Looks: which aspects of appearance matter to me?

By defining your ideal type concretely, you'll have clear criteria for evaluating someone on a date or at a first meeting.

3. Set realistic expectations

Defining your ideal type concretely is important, but so is setting realistic expectations. Since the perfect person doesn't exist, some degree of compromise is necessary. Here are some tips for setting realistic expectations:

• Separate your non-negotiable core values from the things that matter less.
• Think about whether you can accept the other person's flaws.
• Consider what value you can offer the other person.

With realistic expectations in place, you'll be able to keep the relationship moving smoothly when you meet someone close to your ideal type.

4. Self-improvement to meet the bar

Once you know who you are, who your ideal type is, and have set realistic expectations,

the next step is to build the qualities you'll need so that, when you do spot that ideal type, you're attractive to them too. That's why it's important to raise your own value through self-improvement. Here are a few ways to do that:

• Improve your knowledge and abilities through continuous learning and self-development.
• Maintain your physical attractiveness through healthy habits and exercise.
• Build a positive mindset and stronger self-esteem.
• Put the financial conditions needed for marriage in place.

When self-improvement makes you an attractive person, your chances of meeting the ideal type you want go up too.

5. Go where your ideal type is

Once you've learned what's actually needed and met those conditions, you need to go find where your ideal type is. Just as you go to the zoo, not the aquarium, when you want to see a lion, deliberately going to the places where the people you want to meet actually are will save you time and energy.

Take part in a variety of social activities and gatherings.

• Use online dating apps to meet new people.
• Get introduced to new people through friends and acquaintances.

Once you're in the places where your ideal type is, meeting the people who fit best among them increases your chances of finding the person who's truly right for you, without wasting time and energy.

Laid out like this, it sounds easy, but did you get stuck at step 1?

This process is anything but easy. There is a tool called 'Ideal Type Design' that makes it far more intuitive and streamlined, and there are experts who have run thousands of counseling sessions analyzing this tool and helping people find their ideal type. This is the person you'll spend the rest of your life with. Don't agonize over it alone. Get the Ideal Type Design tool from Honza, free of charge!

The journey to find your ideal type isn't easy, but if you understand yourself, set concrete criteria, hold realistic expectations, raise your appeal through self-improvement, and gather a wide range of experiences, your odds of meeting the right person go up dramatically. Through this process, you can meet someone who is truly right for you and begin a happy relationship and marriage.